the devil's juice.

the past two nights i have doped up on this nasty elixir and headed off to warm and fuzzy land for 8+ hours of sleep. i made an executive decision earlier sunday evening not to give in to the want of warm and fuzzies for two reasons; 1. i didn't want to be a groggy, drag ass in the morning and 2. i THOUGHT i was feeling better.

i thought wrong.

on this early monday morning, 2:24 in the AM to be exact, i find myself in a pretty shitty predicament... unable to settle the constant stream of consciousness that is rambling on in my head so that i may catch some much needed shut eye.

either i am stressed out to the max or have developed a dependency on cold medicine after only two nights of usage.

i should have just taken the damn drugs.

all the things i want...

FINO!

sigh.

my watering hole.

all the things i buy...

i've always loved a good notepad and this Kate Spade Long List pad is my new favorite. probably because i am a list making freak. i make list of chores, errands, blog topics, work projects, creative projects, vacation spots, shopping stops, music wants, movie musts, restaurant recs and so on. if i have time to plan anything, there is a list! As you can see from the side of the pad, the pages are striped yellow and white AND each stripe is numbered... here is a great example of proper use.

processing.

by naturemandalas

due to my state of health, i am having the hardest time processing things today. i see and hear and understand all of it but my brain is like, "what am i suppose to do with this crap, make crapade?"

see... not a damn thing makes sense.

hallelujah .

praise the tv gods, it has returned!
or will return... tonight at 9/8 c.

yay me!

last friday i talked about change and trying my hardest not to drink coke, smoke cigarettes and lose a little weight. progress is good.

day: 7
cokes consumed: 0
ciggies smoked: 0
lbs lost: 2

all the things i want...

the crawfish caddy

awesomeness!!!

la pensée de la semaine.

the past couple of weeks i have been balles à la mur with staying focused on getting my head out of my arse and getting down to the nitty gritty with a plan to get to where i wanna go. my heads up, my mind is racing, and i have my eye on the prize. stay focused, monkey... stay focused.

{so yeah, balls to the wall doesn't really translate into french. sorry.}

noted.

by pinkavenger

last night i had a sad dream.

it was an old friend and i. we were fighting over the path our friendship had gone. screaming... not hitting or anything of that sort. and the crazy thing is that it could have been a legitimate fight. the words exchanged between he and i were so real. the words used, the actions made, the sentiments expressed were all extremely palpable. in my dream i felt as if i was in a place i didn't belong.

this is the part in a dream book where it would say...

"meaning:
your conscience is telling you something ... are you getting it?!!... hello?!! anyone there?!!... do you understand or do we need to spell it out for you?!!"

yes! yes! i fucking get it. noted! now back off.

any how, the dream was an exhausting exchange... so exhausting that when i woke up this morning, not only did i have the residual emotions looming within my brain but physically i felt beat... even after 8 hours of sleep. i still have not been able to shake those feelings but i know throughout the day they will drop off one by one.

words can not explain how much i am brokenhearted in losing my friend, my go to guy. i have and will continue to miss, miss, miss him so very much. :*

all the things i buy...

this body butter is the best! my SIL introduced it to me while she was preggers with these beatuies. it is some thick stuff! the shea butter is the thickest in the entire line of The Body Shop Body Butters. the best part about this lotion, it moisturizes for at least 24 hours and you can feel it! use it for a week and you will be able to tell a huge difference in your skin.

warning: i do not recommend using during the humid months in texas... unless you enjoy sweating like a whore in church.

maw-maw II

so the perspective may be off and not to mention the difference of two decades but come on... i told you Ikea went all the way to Latanache Bayou for this picture.

all the things i want...

i saw this little guy while shopping at blue elephant this weekend and again on Pieces website, just now! maybe it's a sign... i should buy him.

outlook.

you know that chime outlook makes when you get a new email....
well. i've been hearing it in my sleep.

i think it may be time to reevaluate.

maw-maw.

this is the photo (it alternates) on the home page of Ikea... i swear to you, SWEAR, this could have been taken at my maw-maw's house in pointe coupee parish. i will try to scrounge up some old photos to compare.